It’s already been (eighty-)four years! What do I have to say about blogging for this long? What have I learned? Have I even learned anything? As hard as it is to *not* immediately follow up this question with some cynical comment disguised as a joke – “Not a goddamn thing!” I’m going to refrain from…wait. In all honestly I do feel like there’s a number of things I’ve accomplished(using the word *very* loosely here) and will acknowledge that I have a hard time imagining what my everyday life would currently be like had I not made that fateful decision four years ago. I have been afforded quite a few new and exciting experiences all stemming from this meager blog site. I also feel like the way I approach, or even play games has evolved over the last few years; there’s the astounding fact that I’ve somehow made a few friends and acquaintances along the way.
In short, 2022 was a year of ups and downs. It started off pretty slow but I was able claw my way out of a depressive hole and get back into a routine of regularly writing and streaming. This momentum carried through most of the summer and I had actually started to regain the smallest shred of confidence in regards to WordPress and Twitch. It was towards the end of the summer where I started to feel a little burned out, yet again by getting perhaps too ambitious – it *does* happen from time to time, by trying to juggle too many different blog projects, stream ideas, games, etc. The final months of the year represented the bottom of the mental/emotional bell curve that was 2022. I had no shortage of ideas drafted up for blog posts, but only a few of them ever materialized and streaming had once again gotten pretty inconsistent. Stressing yourself out over not doing something is never gonna be the most efficient way to accomplish anything…I’m working on it, ok??
Despite my frail state of mind the past year, I am able to look back on the year and feel pleased with some of the things I did accomplish. My favorite posts of 2022 would have to be the Bloodborne Hunter’s Journals, Elden Ring enemies that annoyed the hell out of me and a 2022 trophy showcase. A couple of these posts were memorable as they were collaborations with a few other blogger friends. I even decided to shake things up a bit by writing up a list of game & whiskey pairings this past spring, which I had a lot of fun working on. All of these favorites can also serve as an (uncomfortably)accurate representation of this past year – From Software games, trophy collecting, and alcohol.
Things I want to focus on moving forward…
Keep on writing – Yes, I know. It sounds like such a cliché and I realize I’ve said this very thing for how many years in a row now, but it’s true. I do want to keep on blogging despite occasionally dealing with those intrusive moments of “Fuck it. I don’t care anymore.” I feel like I’ve been doing marginally better in the past few weeks as I’ve managed to get a few posts written up, with a couple more in the conceptual/first draft stage. I’ve taken a small break from streaming these past few weeks to allow myself more time to focus on some other things going on – blogging as well as IRL, and give some perspective on how I want to approach my presence on Twitch going forward. Another thing I’ve been trying to work on in regards to writing is I still don’t feel like I’ve completely found my “voice”. I have no delusions of ever being considered a writer – truth be told, I am still hesitant to use the term ‘blogger’ or ‘streamer’ either. I’m trying to find the balance point somewhere between allowing my personality come through in whatever I’m writing and it *not* being a completely incoherent mess of words. Some of my favorite blog posts of this past year are ones that I was able to overthink *slightly* less about how everything was going to be formatted or structured and just…had fun with it?
Read more – One of the things I set out to do in the latter months of this past year was to read more; setting the goal of reading an honest-to-god entire book for the first time in what feels like an eternity. I used to read quite a bit when I was a kid and would typically have a book nearby at my work desk over the various jobs I’ve had. I’ve also gotten way behind over the past year or so in reading other’s posts from around the community, but have been spending some of my free time during my afternoons at work reading and replying to those. Of course, having the literal attention span of a hamster has made this a lot more difficult lately too, but I’ve been reading a little bit here and there of the Berserk Vol. 1 that I picked up a while back as well as some F. Scott Fitzgerald short stories that I’ve been meaning to read for years.
Don’t set as many goals – I made the joke that one of my New Year’s resolutions was to NOT throw out some half-assed challenge to myself just for the sake of…I don’t even know what. That’s not to say I’m descending further into apathy, but I’m trying to be a little more discerning about what I’m willing to invest my limited mental and physical energy into.
Finally, I want to say thank you to everyone that has read, liked or commented on any of my assorted nonsense over the past 48 months. Starting this blog really has been one of the more impactful decisions I’ve made, whether or not I had any idea at the time.
Here’s to another year of
overthinking productivity! Thanks for reading!